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In The Realm of the Senses PDF Print E-mail

Chapter 2 of the 7th edition of Janet Burroway’s Writing Fiction is called “Seeing Is Believing.” From that, you can guess we’re now focusing on one of the most famous fiction writing principles: show, don’t tell. We’ll be looking at the technique as it is employed by Joyce Carol Oates in the most anthologized of her stories, Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been? on page 65 of the Burroway text, or online here

This is a nail-biter of a story. Connie is a beautiful, restless fifteen-year-old, tired of her small town home life, and beginning to get hot and bothered by sex and rock ‘n roll. Arnold Friend is a forty-year-old oddball who stalks about among the teens at a diner parking lot, where, one night, he wags a finger at Connie and says, “Gonna get you, baby.” A couple days later, when Connie’s family is away at a picnic, Friend drives right up to her door and begins seducing her, attempting to get her to open her screen door, get in his car, and leave her life as she knows it behind. The screen door is essentially the gateway, the threshold to the “territory” of the story: life (or maybe even death) in the arms of Arnold Friend. Connie chooses her doom.

Part of what makes the story work so well is the way it involves us in Connie’s fateful confusion. If Oates had written, “Connie felt disoriented,” we would not care all that much about it. We would not be very engaged in Connie’s experience. We want to witness the character in the act of being disoriented—seeing disorienting imagery (or other things the five senses could detect) around her, experiencing bodily sensations that remind us of our own prior experiences of disorientation (like dizziness), or physically expressing that disorientation (wobbling on her feet, looking around everywhere quickly to gain her bearings). Like a movie director, the fiction writer should keep us aware that we’re in a specific location with a specific atmosphere and should direct the reader’s attention to living experience we can witness and feel a part of. Here is a moment where Connie is so under the influence of the seduction of Arnold Friend that she suddenly feels as if her own home is an alien environment:

                        She was panting. The kitchen looked like a place she had

never seen before, some room she had run inside but that

wasn't good enough, wasn't going to help her. The kitchen

window had never had a curtain, after three years, and there

were dishes in the sink for her to do—probably—and if you

ran your hand across the table you'd probably feel something

sticky there…

 

She rushed forward and tried to lock the door. Her fingers

were shaking…

 

Her eyes darted everywhere in the kitchen. She could not remember

what it was, this room.

 

Burroway talks about the importance of details being specific and concrete, but also significant. A detail is significant when it conveys a value judgment. For example, when Connie is conscious for a fraction of a second that the kitchen window has never had a curtain and that there’s probably something sticky on the table, we are meant to understand that Connie is feeling disdainful toward her home—as if she can’t imagine herself fitting in a place like this any longer. (A less experienced writer might have been tempted to write Connie looked around at her house and felt like it was a shabby place where she no longer belonged.) There are a lot of ‘echoes’ in this story. Toward the very end, Connie has the surreal sensation that even her heart pounding in her chest and the body that houses it do not really belong to her. These are value judgments. The details aren’t randomly chosen just to remind us that Connie is standing in a kitchen and is breathing rapidly. They signify something unspoken. They are giving us a taste of why Connie feels the way she feels and does the things she does. If we didn’t feel her “startled” ambivalence about her home life, her allurement to the mysterious ecstasy she finds in rock and roll music, and “the pure pleasure of being alive” that she experiences when flirting with boys, we would not “get” why she chooses to get in the car of such an obviously untrustworthy man as Arnold Friend. 

Connie could hardly be called unobservant or lacking intuition. In fact, she’s quite apprehensive about Arnold Friend’s trustworthiness. How do we know she’s apprehensive? We’re not told, we’re shown how she’s constantly aware of little things that make Friend seem unnatural.

One of his boots was at a strange angle, as if his foot wasn't in it.

 

She watched this smile come, awkward as if he were smiling

from inside a mask.

 

He stood there so stiffly relaxed, pretending to be relaxed…

 

Evidently his feet did not go all the way down; the boots must

have been stuffed with something so that he would seem taller.

 

He placed his sunglasses on top of his head, carefully, as if he

were indeed wearing a wig…

 

…he had a fair, hairless face, cheeks reddened slightly as if the

veins grew too close to the surface of his skin, the face of a forty-

year-old baby.

 

We get the very distinct feeling, just like Connie does, that “all these things did not come together.” But Oates is careful to keep showing us the girl’s tug of war with lines like, “Connie smirked and let her hair fall loose over one shoulder.” In the first part of that compound sentence, she’s rejecting Arnold Friend. In the second part, she’s inviting him to go on. And in both parts, we’re being shown, not told, about her mixed-up processing of this experience.

When you think about it, the ultimate aim of fiction—its ‘big picture’ goal—is also to show rather than tell. Stories lend meaning to life not by preaching to us about how life works, but by letting made-up “life” speak for itself. According to the author, this story was based on the case of the so-called “Pied Piper of Tucson.” This man pretended to be a teenager, seduced and murdered young girls, and cast enough of a spell over the local teen populace that, for a time, many in the high school crowd helped him keep his secret. Oates was attempting to get to the “why” of that real-life story—Why would girls willingly put their lives at risk with this plainly suspect character? Someone writing an op-ed in a Tucson paper at that time might have answered that question with a abstraction or judgment along the lines of “teens struggling to find their true identity will sometimes make rash and tragic choices.” With Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?, instead of telling us what the essayist might, Oates puts us in the struggle itself.     

 
Reading on Writing—Seen in New Light PDF Print E-mail

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“A story is about a single moment in a character’s life that culminates in a defining choice after which nothing will be the same again.”

Take a good look at those words. That’s Janet Burroway paraphrasing the novelist John L’Heureux in the chapter of “Writing Fiction” on story form. It’s a meaty statement. So much so, I had to take it with a grain of salt when I first read it. Are all stories really about the same thing? And how should they achieve such great magnitude without hitting us over the head?

For this entry, we’ll explore a story that seems like little more than a banal slice of life at times. But it becomes a story of such great magnitude. See Flannery O’Connor’s “Everything That Rises Must Converge.” It’s on page 282 of the 7th edition of Burroway’s book. You can also find it here.

Julian is a jaded college graduate still living at home in the south with his worrywart, status-obsessed mother. The two are heading downtown on the bus one evening, saying the sorts of things they say to one another all the time. On the surface, her goal is simply to get to the Y safely and his is to help get her there, lest she guilt-trip him over “all she did for him.” But below the surface, there is friction between these two over their more pervasive desires this evening.

Julian’s mother wants to look good in town. She wants to show the world she’s someone who comes from good stock and knows her rightful place, higher up in the social spectrum than her finances suggest. And she wants her son to join her in putting up this front. She wants to teach him that he is “a Chestny.” What threatens her getting her wish is that, really, no one cares. Julian wants to take her down a peg. He wants to show her that she’s no better than a lower-class black woman (only very recently allowed to sit at the front of the bus aside such folk as Chestnys) and that she should be ashamed of her deluded self-importance. What threatens his getting his wish is that his mother has such deep-rooted defense mechanisms; she’ll never learn. They both allude to or daydream about these desires throughout the story.

Both would like to see the other come around to their moral ground—to see how wrong they’ve been. But Julian wants to win more than his mother does. He wants “to teach her a lesson.” The story is told primarily from his point of view. So for me, that nagging source of curiosity that keeps me reading to the end is: How can he get through to her? Indeed, he starts taking action. He leaves his seat and sits across the aisle from her, next to a black man. He’s throwing down the gauntlet; he knows she feels that blacks and whites should not mix this way. Later, a black woman takes that seat, and Julian is thrilled to discover this woman is wearing the same hat as his mother. He grins triumphantly across the aisle. In his mind, it’s physical evidence, a symbol of the fact that Mrs. Chestny is no better than anyone else. This should teach her! But it doesn’t register.

In the Burroway text, there’s a quote from the novelist Robert Morgan. “Stories are rarely just about conflict between good and bad. They are more often about conflicts of loyalty, one good versus another…”

It’s plain to see that although Julian’s mother is the one who could more obviously be called “racist,” it’s Julian who is using black people as pawns in his game. Although in theory, Julian is the more equitable, it’s his mother who befriends the black woman’s son. And although Julian professes to have the more realistic view of their class status, his pessimism will keep him needier than she’s ever been. But most of all, although we laugh and look down on Mrs. Chestny from Julian’s vantage, we know that the son is just as obsessively judgmental as woman who raised him. As much as he might point at her (in his mind) saying, “I’m not you,” it seems that she’s actually quite a lot of what he is and, for all we know, she’s all that he has. The conflict of loyalty is that he wants to shame her and help her, be rid of her and remake her.

We can see the conflict between them rising from page to page. She worries over whether the hat makes the right impression. He says it doesn’t matter. She brings up her grandparents old house to show they come from wealth. He says the house is now decayed. He takes off his tie. She makes him put it back on. He sits next to the black man. She stares back reproachfully.

Then, finally, we arrive at “a defining choice after which nothing will be the same again.” Burroway calls this a moment of recognition or epiphany. “As [James] Joyce saw it, epiphany is a crisis action in the mind, a moment when a person, an event, or a thing is seen in a light so new that it is as if it has never been seen before. At this viewing, the mental landscape of the viewer is permanently changed.” And she points out that the recognition must be made manifest or externalized in an action.

Mrs. Chestny—resolutely ignoring the point her son has been trying to make and what Julian observes is the “DON’T TAMPER WITH ME” pride of the toddler’s mother—decides to give the boy a penny. Julian tries to snatch her pocketbook away and hisses “Don’t do it!” But she does. The black woman explodes and Mrs. Chestny veers toward having a stroke. Julian, not realizing what’s happening, decides to use what just happened as ammunition for their fight. “The old manners are obsolete and your graciousness is not worth a damn,” he tells his mother as her body is breaking down. “You aren’t who you think you are.” He may well be dealing the final blow.

But notice how what happens to Julian next fits the description of epiphany above. “He looked into her face and caught his breath. He was looking into a face he had never seen before.” His behavior changes radically. He cries out, calling her “Darling, sweetheart” and “Mamma!” Then there are two lines that are especially surprising. “A tide of darkness seemed to be sweeping her from him,” and “The tide of darkness seemed to sweep him back to her, postponing from moment to moment his entry into the world of guilt and sorrow.” Death itself is playing tricks with Julian’s conflict of loyalty as if to teach him a lesson. The death of close loved one is sweeping her away from him, sweeping him back toward her, and introducing this jaded young man (who had previously thought himself as disenchanted with life as a “man of fifty”) to a whole new world. 

So how would you put into words what Julian finally recognizes? And what do you make of the narration’s shift in tone at the very end?

Next week, we’ll move on to the chapter in “Writing Fiction” called “Seeing Is Believing: Showing and Telling.” We’ll talk about Joyce Carol Oates story “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?” You can find it online here.

Happy reading!

 

 
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